Last night I had this really vivid, intense dream.

In the dream, I had strong feelings for this one particular guy, and, miracle of miracles, he told me he felt the same. There was even a little sex. It was a wonderful dream.

And then we were standing on the 23rd Street platform waiting for the northbound F train, and he started to talk about how he liked vampires. He was really into them. It started to creep me out a little.

And then he turned into one.

Full-out Sunnydale vampire face.

And then he started trying to tempt me, telling me how great it was to be a vampire, wanting to turn me into one, too.

It scared me to death.

You know, this could be why I’m still single.

Here are my two favorite excerpts from today’s New York Times movie reviews, both written by Elvis Mitchell.

On “The Core”:

The brazen silliness of “The Core” is becalming and inauthentic, like taking a bath in nondairy coffee creamer.

On “Basic”:

Someone decided to put “Rashomon” in a Cuisinart along with “A Few Good Men,” “The Usual Suspects” and “A Soldier’s Story,” and hit the pulverize button while forgetting to replace the top. The outcome is a spewing mess spinning at 300 r.p.m.

Reviews of bad movies are so much fun.
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I’m thinking of getting a gay ring.

I’ve never worn a ring — not a class ring, not a wedding ring, not a Kryptonite ring to ward off Superman. (I’m not sure why I’d want to do that anyway. I like Superman.) But in the last few weeks I’ve met several gay men who have rings. The ring is usually silver colored. Sometimes it’s a flat band that wraps around a thumb or finger, sometimes it’s two rings intertwined on one finger, sometimes it’s something else. I’ve seen rings on gay guys before, but for some reason I’ve been noticing them a lot more lately. They look pretty, and slightly artsy, and rebellious. But in a safe way.

Now, I pride myself on being a generally masculine guy. Okay, sure, I don’t really like sports, and I’m into music and theater and writing, and I’m sensitive and emotionally perceptive, and I have several ringer tees and a long-sleeve baseball tee in my dresser, and I like to have sex with men —

Aw, crap. I may as well just complete the picture and get a frickin’ ring.

Being somewhat neurotic, though, I’ve been wondering if people would accuse me of trying to look like every other gay man out there, or tell me that a ring is just not me and that I’m trying to be something I’m not, or tell me it’s not manly enough. I’ve also been wondering if a silver-colored gay ring would go with being a white-collar professional.

Also if it would be annoying to have a little piece of metal wrapped around my finger all the time.

Still, I think I want to go ring-shopping. Unfortunately, I don’t know where to buy one.

Anyone know where I can buy one? Please leave comments here or e-mail me.