I’ve begun working with a career counselor, and she thought it would be helpful for me to take two standardized tests: the Strong Interest Inventory, which evaluates your career interests, and the MBTI, which evaluates your personality type along four dichotomies: introvert (I) vs. extrovert (E), sensing (S) vs. intuiting (N), thinking (T) vs. feeling (F), and judging (J) vs. perceiving (P). I’ve taken abbreviated forms of the MBTI in the past, twice, a long time ago: the first time I came out INTJ, the second time INFP.

I just took the full MBTI for the first time, and it’s so frustrating. It’s a bunch of theoretical questions followed by two alternatives. For instance, do you prefer a schedule or do you prefer to be spontaneous? Do you usually introduce people at parties or do you usually get introduced? Do you prefer a boss who is good-natured and inconsistent, or one who is sharp-tongued and logical? (Can I pick good-natured and logical but also compassionate?)

I had a hard time with many of the questions. I don’t think I have a consistent personality type. I’m a ball of contradictions. Sometimes I want to be alone and sometimes I want to be around other people. I’m more social than I used to be, but it was something I had to learn. Am I more open or more reserved? It depends on how I’m feeling. Do I prefer a schedule or do I prefer to be spontaneous? It depends. Does my head usually rule over my heart or vice versa? No clue. My head and my heart are in constant conflict. I think too much and I feel too much. Do I prefer logic or emotion? Coldly logical people bother me, but I don’t like mawkish sentiment either.

Grrr.

You know, if I were on the Supreme Court I’d be Justice Kennedy. No, O’Connor. Or maybe Breyer.

Granted, this test doesn’t determine the outcome of my life, or anything, really. It’s just supposed to be insightful. But it still pisses me off because it tries to pigeonhole me into categories, and I don’t like to be pigeonholed. I mean, look. Once I came out INTJ and once INFP. And on the I/E questions 10 years ago, I came out almost equally introverted and extroverted.

Anyway, I’ll see how I wind up scoring this time. It will be really interesting. Or maybe not.