I just got back from buying my six-year-old cousin a Hanukkah gift to give to her at our family Hanukkah party tonight. I’ve decided I love shopping for little girls. I saw a Barbie dressed as Batgirl and a Barbie dressed as Poison Ivy. Fortunately I didn’t see Barbie dressed as Halle Berry in Catwoman, or I think I would have gone blind.

I wound up buying my cousin a Barbie “Princess and the Pauper” gift set. I told this to Matt when I got back and he looked at me in horror. I think he thought I’d bought a Barbie dressed as a homeless person. (Homeless Barbie! Mattel needs to get on that.) Then I told him the Barbie came with two little girls, and he said, “Are they orphans or something?” I imagined two little-girl dolls dressed in rags with sad expressions on their faces.

Rest assured, the Barbie is wearing a beautiful pink dress and a golden crown, and the two little girls are wearing pretty dresses as well. There’s also a little cat. My cousin won’t be having any nightmares.