Tag Archives: judaism

Don’t Touch the Hasids

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The torturously slow fight for marriage equality in New York State has been going on for the last week. There have been lots of rallies, pro and con.

Yesterday something interesting happened. State senator Ruben Diaz, the only Democrat to oppose equality, showed up at a rally with a bunch of anti-gay Hasidic Jews. Then suddenly Rabbi Sharon Kleinbaum of Congregation Beit Simchat Torah, the LGBT synagogue in New York City, appeared with her own pro-equality sign. A sign battle ensued for a few moments as each side tried to get their sign in front of the camera.

And then, for some reason, Rabbi Kleinbaum did something controversial: she put her arm around the shoulder of one of the Hasidic Jews. This is just not done. Hasidic Jews believe it’s wrong to physically touch people of the opposite sex other than your spouse.

Below is the video of what happened. For a moment the man did nothing; maybe it took him a few seconds to realize what was going on. But then he violently pulled away, as if he’d touched a pulsating pile of human brains, and he and his colleague ritually spit in Rabbi Kleinbaum’s direction and began shouting at her, “You are not a Jew!”

For some reason she seemed surprised that these guys were so upset. Come on, rabbi: you’re an expert on Judaism. How did you expect them to react?

I really don’t understand what her point was. Maybe she was trying to be friendly? At any rate, I think it was stupid of her to touch the guy. I don’t think she had any right to do so; would it have been proper to force feed him a ham sandwich?

And it undermines our message. One of the points of the marriage equality movement is that it is distinctly not about infringing on other people’s religious practices. Religion should not infringe upon the state, and vice versa. If marriage equality becomes law, Hasidic Jews and evangelical Christians will still have the right to refuse such marriages from taking place in their houses of worship; they will continue to have every right to practice their religion. They just won’t be permitted to make the rest of us practice it as well.

I can understand why some people might think it was okay for Kleinbaum to try to “teach the guy a lesson.” After all, Hasidic Judaism is homophobic and sexist; these men are trying to impose their beliefs on other people, and the imposition of their beliefs has harmful consequences for real-life couples and families; and they chose to protest in a secular location, and a crowded one at that, so they should have expected that they might accidentally touch someone of the opposite gender.

But Kleinbaum went out of her way to put her arm around the guy. She didn’t bump into him. She did it deliberately.

No, it’s not a terrible thing. But it wasn’t really necessary, either.

Comments on the Jewish Standard

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By the way, the comments that numerous readers have left on the page containing the Jewish Standard’s original craven apology are pretty terrific, almost uniformly in condemnation. Most of them are wonderfully heartfelt and well-written.

And some of them are just funny. This one made me laugh.

You people are just a “ray of sunshine” for everyone, aren’t you?

Good luck with your Einstein decision to align yourselves with the haters.

I don’t know how to explain why, but there’s just something so great and Jewish about that comment.

This is my other favorite:

There are not words strong enough to shame you. Not even in Yiddish.

Jewish Standard: Followup

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There’s some fascinating follow-up to the story of the Jewish newspaper in New Jersey that decided to discriminate against gay couples.

Yesterday, the newspaper published a new statement saying that it may have acted too quickly in deciding to discriminate:

We ran the wedding announcement because we felt, as a community newspaper, that it was our job to serve the entire community — something we have been doing for 80 years.

We did not expect the heated response we got, and — in truth — we believe now that we may have acted too quickly in issuing the follow-up statement, responding only to one segment of the community.

We are now having meetings with local rabbis and community leaders. We will also be printing, in the paper and online, many of the letters that have been pouring in since our statement was published.

We urge everyone to take a step back and reflect on what this series of events has taught us about the community we care so much about, and about the steps we must take to move forward together.

There’s also word that the editor of the paper, Rebecca Boreson, personally disagreed with the decision to discriminate but was pressured into it by the Orthodox community of Teaneck, NJ, where the newspaper is published.

It’s also possible that the newspaper was essentially blackmailed into this decision by the organization that certifies kosher restaurants, which threatened to decertify any kosher restaurant that continued to advertise in the newspaper if the newspaper continued to run same-sex marriage announcements:

It is my understanding that the Jewish Standard was basically being blackmailed. The RCBC, the Orthodox Rabbinate threatened to take away the hechsher, the certificate of kashrut, from any restaurant that continued to advertise in the Jewish Standard if they did not announce that they would never publish another gay wedding announcement. This would effectively put the Standard out of business, as it is advertising and not subscriptions that keeps their doors open, and it would have put the Kosher restaurants, caterers, and other Kosher food providers in the position of having to find another hechsher, which in Bergen county would be hard to do. It would alienate the Orthodox community from all of the liberal Jews who keep Kosher and it could cause financial havoc in the Jewish community. RCBC should be ashamed.

If true, these are disgusting and thuggish tactics.

On the other hand, this is not an example of courageous journalism, either, and it could have been handled much better. The publishers of the newspaper look like total cowards. As one commenter here says:

I’m not going to say “thanks” for your reconsideration on the subject like some other people. I’m taking a step back and I’m still baffled by the quick kowtowing to these Orthodox Rabbis SO quickly- like they were the Sopranos threatening cement shoes.

Additionally, here’s an interview with the couple who was the subject of the original wedding announcement that started this whole thing. They talk about what they think of all this:

I would hope that people don’t jump to conclusions and blame the newspaper. I think they made a mistake but are a generally good and pluralistic newspaper. The Jewish Standard will stay afloat with support from the greater community. They don’t need to toe the Orthodox line.

Finally, the New York Times might be working on a story about all this. That wouldn’t be surprising.